I am Alive

I find myself occupied with task of writing a heftily procrastinated research paper–the time 1:29 displayed on my fuzzy computer screen is a homage to the great God of Tomorrow. I have waited too long to begin writing on my paper. Although I feel distraught to leave a book unfinished and begin reading another, I have had to leave seven riveting books unfinished in order to attain enough workable perspective. I admit part of my fascination is due to my self-imposed ostracism and my unremittent dedication to my God of Tomorrow, but excuses still do not relieve the mental instability of leaving books unfinished.

I spent last night in far too lax a mentality. I spent today with far too little attention to actually accomplishing work, and from this lack of mental fortitude, I reserve every right to be justified in achieving a less than tolerable grade for my paper.

I am not the only person gripped by the throat of Summer’s reaching fingers; my senior classmates seem to be disenchanted with the idea of spending their last full month engaged in worshiping the Tomorrow. They’re so involved Tomorrow’s prospects of college and with Today’s prospects of relaxation, that they forget which is even eminent today!

As much as I would like to be, I am not justified in using the excuse of my friends as an excuse to subdue my conscience; I am not justified in procrastinating as such.

I may now have conveyed my state of affairs. I hope I have done so accurately, because I have no other occupation in whining; I will therefore now digress to a different subject.

I am attempting to write a play, and I have outlined a theme and characters and some phrases to work in and play with. I think it would be rather keen to inconspicuously set the plot in Rapid City. I would–to an outsider–be able to describe the setting with the utmost originality and the most perceptive observations, and seem to be so brilliant in my contrivances as to make the place seem real. I have left to pick the scenes and set the specifics of the play, but if I keep my motivation and idle time, I’m sure that will drop in nicely.

I am on hiatus from The Grapes of Wrath, but I am indeed reading it. I am also on a much extended hiatus from La Belle France and various books by and about Vaclav Havel, Peace Like a River, War and Peace, A Light in August, and The Death of a Salesman. Unfortunately, I have no idea when I’ll be able to finish any of those.

It is becoming unreasonably late and I have to continue writing my paper tomorrow; good night.

Filed under Myself |